Love one another as I have loved you

Peter my husband, wanted to go back to retire in Napier where his friends were, I did not want to and told him I so. “There is nothing back there for me,” I said. I didn't even want to go back even for a visit. When we had left Napier the words “I will bring you back to this land” had come into my mind and I knew it was God speaking to me, but now nine years later, I began wondering if it had been God speaking to me back then or not. I asked Him.
I opened a version of the bible that I hadn’t read from for some time and found a piece of paper with a prophecy on it that had been given to me in 2000. It spoke about God putting me in a position where I would need sacrificial love. “….there will be a cost but do it and you will see the glory of God fall. God will sustain you….love one another..” I wondered what God meant.
During the week I was impressed by a bible verse about God putting all my past sins behind Him. How wonderful this knowledge was. I was awed at God’s love. On the Friday I got a call from the police in New Zealand telling me that Peter’s brother Andrew had died. It was such a shock that I sat around dazed. He had cared for his mother and now she had no family there in Napier. Peter came straight home from work and I put my arms around him and told him that I would go back to live in New Zealand if he wanted me to. I thought about God having put all my sins behind me and felt that I needed to do the same for others.

We went back to New Zealand and helped organise the funeral. I went to see Andrew wearing his brand new suit, in his coffin, but got such a shock, the same kind of shock I had experienced when I left my own body and looked down at it when I had stopped breathing in hospital after surgery. The life had departed from Andrew’s body. It was the same grey as I had seen mine.

I washed all the things that needed washing at Andrew’s house and while bagging up his clothes found a T Shirt with the words “Love one another” on it. I felt like keeping the shirt but I bagged it up and gave it away with the rest of his clothes. I knew God was wanting me to love as He had loved me. He had given up everything for us and I knew that we should give our lives to love others like that too. Was this the time for the fulfilment of the prophecy? I felt a deep compassion for my mother in law and so I told her that I would come back when her other son left so that she didn't need to worry. She said “Would you give your life up for me?” I said "Yes". She had cared for her mother and husband before they died and it would be sad if there was no family there to take her out from time to time.

Financially we were not in a position to retire but I set my mind to go and visit her again, knowing that God would sustain me. He had provided in the past and would do so again if I was needed there. It didn't feel like a sacrifice anymore...it felt like love.